Jun. 6, 2024 - Old Spice is... sigh... a beverage
- Prep: Shower, Baxter Shave Tonic
- Brush: Paragon Plisson Type
- Razor: Heritage Collection Gibbs 15
- Blade: Personna Platinum (2)
- Lather: Stone Field Shaving Company - No. 37
- Post Shave: Old Spice Classic (US)
No. I am not going to drink Old Spice. Aftershave does, in fact, have multiple carcinogens in it that should not be consumed and aftershave poisoning is a real medical thing. Sadly, alcoholics who lose access to alcohol have been known to drink aftershave in order to get their fix and it can cause extreme health issues. Given that, and the general rules about not doing stupid stuff for fake Internet shaving points, I am not going to drink Old Spice aftershave to prove to everyone that Old Spice is a beverage.
However, I do have some old spice. As in spice that has been sitting at the back of my spice cabinet for years, going through multiple moves. It is, in a literal sense, an old spice. People put spices in all sorts of beverages. In fact, many beverages are simply water flavored with spices of some sort or another. Thus if I put this old spice into water I would have an Old Spice Beverage. By logic then, Old Spice soap could be inspired by this Old Spice Beverage.
"Wait," you and the judges (always right they are) say, "In order for a beverage to be a beverage someone has to drink it." To which I say, "Hold my beverage."
On a more personal note, you may have noticed I didn't post yesterday. This is not because I didn't have some Old Spice canned goup I picked up at Walmart (they sell a head shave Old Spice cream) but because of u/onionmiasma. You see, he and I were kind of playing a fun thing on here pretending we were arguing with each other over a smush I forgot to send him - trading barbs back and forth in a light-hearted way. However, Tuesday, he kind of took it too far, claiming I was some sort of convicted criminal and sex offender because he found one on the Internet who wore Old Spice. There's jokes and there's insulting someone. It, honestly, wasn't cool at all and not in the spirit of what we were doing. I'm not one to air laundry out so I won't go into too much detail but suffice to say I was genuinely not feeling like putting on Old Spice or participating yesterday thanks to his post. Anyway, Onion is kind of an actual jerk so... yea.
Edit: I'm supposed to say something nice about u/visceralwatch but when I met him all I got was a stupid sticker.